The past six months have been challenging, to say the least. I think throughout my life, this is the greatest amount of change I’ve experienced in such a short space of time. A new location, less money, more ministry, less time.
If I could put it into words, I’d say I lost hope. The joy and fun I once experienced in the everyday moments of life had disappeared. I struggled to wake up in the morning. I dreaded the constant commute. There was no satisfaction in completing my daily tasks. Life had started to feel heavy, like one long chore.
What’s worse, I ignored all the signs that screamed, “Something needs to change.”
Instead of taking time to re-evaluate what truly mattered, I allowed life to live me instead of choosing to live it myself.
What had happened to my old favourite saying - “Live your blessed life”?
For a while, I’d been praying for new opportunities and fresh chances, but every door that opened felt like it eventually slammed shut in my face.
One day, I watched a friend of mine do something brave. She let go of something that had been holding her back for years. Yes, she was scared, but she refused to let fear control her any longer.
It struck me. This friend doesn’t necessarily believe in God the way I do, or even claim to. So if she had the courage to take a leap without knowing God would catch her on the other side, why on earth was I allowing fear to hold me back?
So I did something new.
- I quit my job with nothing lined up
- I touched base with six different countries in two months
- I applied for a dream job
…and then I let God do what He does best: catch me.
Like with all moments of bravery, though, the rollercoaster follows. The faith and confidence you have on Monday can be shaken by the wind on Tuesday and knocked by a stone on Wednesday if you don’t stay connected.
I was tested in ways I never saw coming, but I didn’t stop trusting. I kept praying the simple prayer: “Lord, help my unbelief.”
I’d be lying if I said it was easy.
I’d be lying if I said I was patient through all of it.
But looking back now, all I can tell you is this: God did exactly what He always does. He caught me.
- I’ve had the chance to jump wholeheartedly back into ministry
- I’ve made unforgettable memories
- And tomorrow, I start a brand-new role
God knows exactly what He is doing. Even when we can’t see it yet. Oh, taste and see.
Psalm 34:8
“Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good;
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him!”
